Current Rating - 3.04 With 680 votes
A hunter set out for the woods with his rifle, looking for bear. A couple of hours passed and he saw brown fur deep in the bushes.
He took careful aim and fired, there was a great commotion in the undergrowth and he hurried to the spot to see what he had shot.
He was amazed to find no trace of the animal and was still searching when a paw tapped him on the shoulder, he turned to find a big male bear, wearing a nasty expression.
He was amazed when the bear took his gun and snapped it in half.
He was even more amazed when the bear spoke "That was not a nice thing to do?" said the bear. Displaying a handful of very large sharp claws the bear said "I am going to have to kill you now, Unless!"
"Unless what?" the hunter said.
"Unless you step behind that bush remove your jeans and underwear, bend over and let me have my way with you" said the bear.
With no other option the hunter complied and following a very painful interlude walked - with difficulty - back to camp.
A few days later, armed with a bigger gun, he set out for the woods again.
Following a long hike through the trees he saw a bear in plain sight beside some bushes, took aim and shot it. The hunter ran to the place to see if it was the same bear. There was no bear to be seen. He was still searching the under growth when he felt a familiar tap on the shoulder.
It was the same bear, who took his gun and bent it into a circle. "What is it to be?" The bear asked. "Be torn to death or service me and, my four brothers?"
The hunter reached camp two days later, crawling on all fours. He took a week to heal and then, armed with the biggest gun he could find, the hunter set off determined to find revenge. Deep in the woods, once again, he saw a brown furry shape almost hidden by a tree. Taking careful aim he shot it.
When he reached the scene he saw there was no corpse. He stepped around the tree to check and found a long line of smiling bears.
At which time a familiar voice said: "You are not really here for the hunting, are you?"