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New Lawyer Riddles

Here are our most recent 10 New Lawyer Riddles. Be sure to rate as many of our Random Lawyer Riddles as you want. Check our all of our other categories too!

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Added on Wednesday, February 19th

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and an amoeba?

A: One wears a tie.

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Added on Thursday, February 13th

Q: Why was the lawyer skimming the Bible right before he died?

A: He was looking for loopholes!

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Added on Sunday, January 26th

Q: Why does the bar association prohibit lawyers and clients from having sex?

A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

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Added on Wednesday, April 3rd

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a lawyer?

A: You take your shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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Added on Monday, April 1st

Q: What do you call a lawyer who has gone bad?

A: Senator.

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Added on Thursday, February 28th

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a lab rat?

A: There are just some things that a rat won't do.

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Added on Monday, March 19th

Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Attila the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do?

A: Shoot the lawyer twice.

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Added on Monday, March 19th

Q: Do you know why lawyers wear neckties?

A: To keep the foreskin from creeping out.

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Added on Wednesday, January 11th

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

A1: 'How many can you afford?'

A2: It only takes one to change your bulb...to his.

A3: Two. One to change it and one to keep interrupting by standing up and shouting 'Objection!'

A4: Three. One to do it and two to sue him for malpractice.

A5: Three. One to turn the bulb, one to shake him off the ladder, and the third to sue the ladder company.

A6: Three. One to sue the power company for insufficiently supplying power, or negligent failure to prevent the surge that made the bulb burn out in the first place, one to sue the electrician who wired the house, and one to sue the bulb manufacturers.

A7: Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.

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Added on Wednesday, December 21st

Q: What’s the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

A: The lawyer charges more.

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