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Two guys were playing golf when the first one said, "I really need to take a crap..."
"The second replied, "Well there's a tree, go behind it and do your stuff."
"The first guy looks over at the tree and comments, "But, I don't have any toilet paper."
Being a witty fellow, the second man remarks, "You have a dollar don't you? Just use it to wipe yourself"
Reluctantly, the first guy goes and does his stuff. Minutes later he comes back with crap all over him. The second asks, "Damn, what happened? Didn't you use the dollar?"
"Hell yes, but have you ever tried to wipe with three quarters, two dimes, and a nickel?"