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Morty, Simon and Jack were discussing their daily health woes.
Morty sighs and says, "I hate having to try to pee in the morning. I'll sit on the toilet for hours and all I can manage is a slow dribble. It's torture."
Simon shakes his head, and says, "I have it worse. I sit on the pot for hours hoping for a BM. It's agonizing."
Jack turns up his lips, and says, "You two think you have it bad? I never have those kinds of trouble. I've relieved myself completely by 8 o'clock every morning."
Morty and Simon look at each incredulously and turn to Jack. "What on earth are you complaining about, then?!" they ask.
"I don't wake up until 9!"