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Masturbation Jokes

Current Rating - 2.91    With 90 votes

A guy who has nothing to do all day except play with himself, gets very down and hard on his luck, so he finally decides to consult a palmist regarding his future.

He meets the palmist and asks him about job possibilities, marriage prospects etc. The palmist takes one good look at his hands and orders him to strip from the waist down. He then tells him that everything will fall into place within six months...that he'll find a great high paying job and also get a gorgeous wife.

After six months, he goes back to the palmist all happy and glowing because all the predictions have come true, but one essential question remains. He asks respectfully, "If you don't mind, will you please tell me why did you tell me to strip on that day?"

The palmist replies, "Well! That's easy enough; you've used your hand so much that all the lines got imprinted down there!!!"

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