Current Rating - 3.03 With 139 votes
Paddy the Irishman died in a fire and was burnt pretty badly. So the morgue needed someone to identify the body. His two best friends, Seamus and Sean (also Irishmen), were sent for.
Seamus went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Seamus said "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over". So the mortician rolled him over. Seamus looked and said "Nope, it ain't Paddy".
The mortician thought that was rather strange and then he brought Sean in to identify the body. Sean took a look at him and said, "Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over". The mortician rolled him over and Sean looked down and said, "No, it ain't Paddy".
The mortician asked, "How can you tell?"
Sean said, "Well, Paddy had two arse holes."
"What, he had two arse holes?!" said the mortician.
"Yup, everyone knew he had two arse holes. Every time we went into town, folks would say, "Here comes Paddy with them two arseholes..."