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An Amishman had stolen some lumber, and soon got to feeling very guilty about it. He was too embarrassed to go to his Amish bishop. Thus he decided to go to confession at a Catholic church to deal with his transgression.
In the confessional, he told the priest that he had sinned.
"What was your sin, my son?" asked the priest.
"I stole some lumber, Father," replied the penitent.
"How much lumber did you steal?" asked the priest.
"Father, I built my German Shepherd dog a nice new doghouse."
The priest replied, "Well, that's not so bad."
The penitent interrupted him. "Father, I also built myself a 4-car garage."
The priest then responded, "Now that's a little more serious!"
The penitent again interrupted the priest, "Father, I've got to get it off my chest. I built a doghouse, a 4-car garage, and a 5-bedroom 4-bath home!"
With a look of shock, the priest then responded, "Well, that is most serious. I'm afraid that you'll have to make a novena."
The penitent Amishman looked perplexed and then said, "Father, I don't know what a novena is, but if you've got the blueprints, I've got the lumber."